Parents of priests and seminarians meet, worship, and dine together

By Father Joseph Corel, Margaret Oligschlaeger, and Paul Oligschlaeger

Priests are married to the Mystical Body of Christ, the Church. Who helps the priest prepare for this "wedding" (his priestly ordination)? The parents of the priest do a lot of preparations:  compiling a guest list, ordering and filling out invitations, getting hotels reserved near the Cathedral, and answering questions about how they are feeling and if they are ready for the big day.

Most parents know very few others who have been through the experience except for parents of their sons' schoolmates. When do the parents of the priest meet the in-laws? Who exactly are the in-laws? That may be a bit of a theological stretch, but it did make for a good time and a lot of fun the night of Aug. 16, 2008, when Bishop John R. Gaydos celebrated Mass and hosted dinner for the parents of priests and seminarians. In attendance were the parents of 10 seminarians and eight priests. Where were the seminarians? They were at home - some spending time with their siblings, labeling clothing items and packing for departure for the seminary the following week.

The idea of priests' and seminarians' parents coming together for Mass and a social event was based on the need to encourage the parents of seminarians. Research and personal testimony show that many parents would not encourage their child to think about Priesthood. These parents either were encouraging, or their son decided to pursue the seminary anyhow. So it is important for the parents of priests to share their joy, happiness and peace as parents of priests.

As the crowd was gathering at the Alphonse J. Schwartze Memorial Catholic Center, cards for people to write their names, phone numbers, e-mails and addresses were passed around so everyone could stay in touch with each other long after the evening was over. Mingling was immediate between parents of the seminarians and parents of the priests. When it was time for Mass, it was impressive to see seminarians' parents and priests' parents sitting together, not separated.

Bishop Gaydos presided at Mass and preached the homily. He said the group in the chapel with him was small but mighty, and that he hoped it would grow as more men enter seminary. After Mass, it was time to go to the conference room at the Catholic Center for pork loin dinner, home-cooked by Dan and Julie Wieberg and served by them and Joe and Judy Birk.

The room had been transformed into a dining room like that of a fine restaurant! Priest's parents and seminarian parents shared individual dining tables, visiting and becoming acquainted with each other and their family. As in the chapel, parents of both seminarians and priests interacted, discussed their sons and shared a wonderful meal. They shared questions, noted the many similarities in preparing for the new experience ahead, along with their sons' faith and sincerity in exploring and discerning God's call. We talked about the special privilege they as parents all share to encourage and pray for our sons.

The parents of priests talked about their sons' time in the seminary and what a blessing it is to have a son as a priest. The parents of seminarians reflected on what the application process was like and how their son is doing in seminary.

Time well spent

Dan and Peggy Fechtel, parents of seminarian, Christopher Fechtel, were among the attendees. "I thought it was very nice to put faces to names that we've heard from Christopher, and to meet the parents of Christopher's classmates in the seminary," said Mr. Fechtel. "It would be a good idea to do this again so parents could talk together on how things are going with our sons."

"We were excited to come and renew friendships and meet parents of new seminarians," said Irma Schmitz, mother of Father John Schmitz, who attended with her husband and Fr. Schmitz's father, Alfred. "I have always found the other parents to be so very, very supportive of us. I hope we could be as supportive as other parents of priests and seminarians had been to us. With our fellowship and sharing our story, hopefully we offered support and reassurance to these younger parents." She added that it was also nice to catch up with parents who had been through the seminary with them.

Ed and Claudia Galbraith, parents of seminary junior James Galbraith, said they received a lot of reassurance and insight by talking to the parents of priests. "We never get tired of hearing the stories of the great families who have given priestly vocations to the diocese," said Mrs. Galbraith. "Every one is different with some unique perspective. However, we all had one important thing in common- we are parents wishing to serve God through their own married vocation and at the same time, open to their son's full-time vocation to the Church."

Jack and Mary Meystrik, parents of Father Gregory Meystrik, said they had a great time and were very happy to meet the seminarians' parents. Mrs. Meystrik said she hopes the evening would lead to continued communication through letters and occasional telephone calls, and to a closer relationship and more mutual support of the parents and their sons in the seminary and the Priesthood.

By the time the evening was over, everyone in attendance was suggesting that this become an annual event. Jim and Jan Martin, parents of seminary freshman Eric Martin, mentioned the support they felt and that the evening helped them put faces to the names they had heard. "For us, this is so new," said Mrs. Martin. "It was good because in visiting with priests' parents it helps us to be aware of what we are doing as a family on a daily level and to relay that to our son who is away in the seminary. It was enjoyable to hear about the priests' interest and hobbies (from the parents). We see and work with priests all of the time, but we don't get to hear about their families."